Bonjour à tous, je dois passer un oral d'anglais en fin de semaine. Je me suis fais un petit texte bateau pour ne pas trop perdre la tete le jour J. Seulement, mon niveau d'anglais étant très faible je recherche une ou plusieurs personnes qui seraient très sympa de bien vouloir me corriger mes fautes si c'est possible ou meme refaire les phrases si elles n'ont pas de sens. Désolé à l'avance des fautes et merci à vous de m'aider.PERSO:
 
So, my name is ....... I am twenty four year old. I was born three august. I rehearse my BTS this year, in free candidate. I lived in Haute-Normandie, in a town of 2.600 (two thousand and six hundred) inhabitants, which is called R......  I am an owner of a house, with my friend. We have 4 rooms and 800 m ² (eight hundred square meters) of ground. Also, I have a cat «C[quote]araille» and a dog «Espagnou ".  
I obtained my driving license on April 10th of this year. Therefore, I am going to be able to be an employment in the field of the real estate. Finally, at present, I am in search to find a wheelchair.
I never have been in England. The only times when I left abroad, it was to leave for Spain and for Germany there where is my family.  
 
INTERETS:
 
I like the dance, I like the dance, and moreover, I have it match 8 years. I like the computing, to surf on the net, the reading. My friend being a fireman, I help fire brigades to prepare all the appearances voluntarily. It occupies when we do not work. Furthermore, I like helping the persons. I need a human contact permanently.
 
CETTE ANNEE:
 
This year, I have made of the baby-sitting as work because I did not manage to find an employment in the real-estate. I shall later like working in a real estate agency, as estate manager. I hold property management. Where then, to work in the field of the co-ownership because it is a domain gives a complex that I like particularly. To work in real estate agency is a passion. It is a fascinating, enriching profession, but especially diversifying.
 
CONCLUSION:
 
To conclude, after the tests of the BTS, I seek an employment. I will do everything to find an agency estate which accepts me.  
Lastly, I prepare also my voyage in Spain for 1 month in August. I will really like to become bilingual because it is an asset during maintenance of recruiting. As I have a low English level, I will test Spanish. Being a simpler living language but especially because I have opportunity of rather often going to Spain.

PERSO:

So, my name is ....... I am twenty four year old. I was born the third of august. I rehearse??? my BTS this year, in free candidate. I lived in Haute-Normandie, in a town of 2.600 (two thousand and six hundred) inhabitants, which is called R......  I live in my own house, with my friend(Quoique je ne vous pas l'interet...). We have 4 rooms in a 800 m ² (eight hundred square meters) of ground. About pets, I have a cat «C[quote]araille» and a dog «Espagnou ".
I obtained my driving license on April 10th of this year. Therefore, I am going to be able to be an employment in the field of the real estate. Finally, at present, I am in search to find a wheelchair. Totalement incohérent... que veut tu dire par là au juste??
I have never been to England. The few times I travelled abroad, it was to Spain and to Germany since I have some family there.  

INTERETS:

I like dancing and moreover, I have it match??? rien pigé... que veut tu dire par ça? 8 years. I like computers, surfing on the net,and reading. My friend being a fireman, I help fire brigades to prepare all the appearances voluntarily. I do that often when I'm not busy with work. I basically like helping the others, and volunteer work. I feel comfortable with human contact.

CETTE ANNEE:

This year, I used to work as a baby sitter because I could not manage to get a job in the real-estate field. I would like to work in a real estate agency, as an estate manager. I hold property management???. I'd move there to specialise in co-ownership, which is , indeed a complex domain, but still a domain that I particularly like and that fascinates and passionates me, as much as the whole real estate field. I'm confident that it's a very rich profession that will enhance my personnal skills

CONCLUSION:

To conclude, after the tests of the BTS, I will be seeking an employment. I'm willing to do what it takes to find a job in a real estate agency, by proving that I have the skills required for the job.
I am also preparing my trip to Spain for 1 month in August. I am willing to master other languages because it is a valuable skill that will help raise my chances finding the job I want. As my English is not very good, I am considering taking a test in Spanish.I feel more comfortable with spanish, and of course, being able to travel often to Spain will be of great help to my learning process.

Voilà, j'ai fais de mon mieux (quand j'ai pu ) j'ai corrigé essentiellement les erreurs grammaticales et quelques erreurs de style vu que je ne sais pas à quoi servirai cette lettre

Je reprend ce que tu as mis en apportant ma correction sur les éléments que moi j'ai compris:

So, my name is ....... I am twenty four years old. I was born in august the 3rd. I am preparing a BTS this year, as a free candidate. I lived in Haute-Normandie, in a town of 2.600 (two thousand and six hundred) inhabitants, which is called R...... I live with in a house with four roomates; we share a a 4 bedroom of 800 m². Concerning pets that I might have: I have a cat «C[quote]araille» and a dog «Espagnou ".
 
I obtained my driving license on April 10th of this year. Therefore, I am going to be able to fill a position in the field of the real estate. Finally, at present I am currently looking for a wheelchair. (tu cherche un fauteuil roulant ?)

I have never been to England. The few times I travelled abroad, I went to visit my family in Germany or Spain

INTERETS:

I like dancing and have been practising it for 8 years. I like computers, surfing on the net,and reading. Since my friend is a fireman, I also help on a volontary basis the fire brigades to prepare all their runs. I do that often when I'm not busy with work. I like helping others, and get involved in volunteer work. I also enjoy human contact.

THIS YEAR:

This year, worked as a baby sitter because I didn't find a job in real-estate. I would like to work in a real estate agency, as an estate manager. I hold property management???. I'd move there to specialize in co-ownership, which is even though being a complex domain, is still a domain that I particularly like and that passionates me, as much as the whole real estate field. I'm confident that it's a very rich profession that will enhance my personnal skills

CONCLUSION:

To conclude, after I graduate with the BTS, I will be seeking an employment. I'm willing to do what ever it takes to find a job in a real estate agency, by proving that I have the required skills for the job.
I am also preparing a trip to Spain for 1 month in August. I am willing to master other languages because it is a valuable skill that will help increase my chances to find the position I want. As my English is not very good, I am considering taking a test in Spanish.I feel more comfortable with spanish, and of course, being able to travel often to Spain will be of great help to my learning process.

Si tu lis ce genre de texte à un entretien de recrutement, c'est un peu comme donner un baton pour se faire taper. Tu évoque explicitement tes lacunes et ne propose pas vraiment de solution pour les éliminer.
Après si c'est juste pour un exam...

c'est juste pour un ORAL D'ANGLAIS comme précisé....l'important c'est juste que je parle pendant 10 minutes sans faire trop de fautes!!Merci à vous de m'aider

PERSO:
 
My name is ....... I am twenty four year old. I was born on august third. I prepare my BTS this year, as free candidate. I live in Haute-Normandie, in a town of 2.600 (two thousand and six hundred) inhabitants, which is called R......  I am the owner of a house, with my friend. We have a 4 rooms and 800 m ² (eight hundred square meters) property. In addition, I have a cat «Caraille» and a dog «Espagnou ".  
I obtained my driving license on April 10th of this year. Therefore, I am going to be able to be an employment can be employed in the field of the real estate. Finally, at present, I am in search to find of a wheelchair.
I have never been in England. The only times when I left abroad, it was to leave for I went to Spain and to Germany where my family is.  
 
INTERETS:
 
I like the dance, I like the dance, and moreover, I have done it for 8 years. I like the computers, to surf on the net, to read. My friend being a fireman, I help fire brigades to prepare all the activities voluntarily. It takes time when we do not work. Furthermore, I like to help people. I need a human contact permanently.
 
CETTE ANNEE:
 
This year, I have done baby-sitting as work because I did not manage to find an employment in the real-estate. Later, I would like to work in a real estate agency, as estate manager. I could manage properties. And then, to work in the field of the co-ownership because it is a domain with a complexity that I like particularly. To work in real estate agency is a passion. It is a fascinating, enriching profession, but especially diverse.
 
CONCLUSION:
 
As a conclusion, after the BTS tests, I seek an employment. I will do everything to find an agency estate which accepts me.  
Finally, I also prepare my travel in Spain for 1 month in August. I will really like to become bilingual because it is an asset during maintenance of for recruiting. As I have a low English level, I will test Spanish. Because it's a simpler living language but especially because I have opportunity to often go to Spain.
 
 
 
Je me suis aussi essayé à la traduction d'anglais
C'est loin d'être un anglais parfait, mais on ne demandera pas son avis à Shakespeare.
En fait j'ai essayé de sortir le moins possible de la version initiale de façon à ce que snipermary puisse utiliser les formules rapidement.